2015

Happy New Year folks!

2014 has been a bumpy year for me personally and probably generally a very bad year for many people globally.

Let’s take a look at global level. If we play a word association game, the word I instinctively associate with 2014 would be plane, disaster, tragedy. It’s been a very bad year for Malaysia Airline, Malaysia, AirAsia and an even more horrible year for the families of all the victims involved in all the major accidents happened throughout this year.  This event map pretty much clearly describe 2014. It has not been a good year. I hope that things will be better 2015.

Personally, I have my ups and downs, mostly emotionally. I went through quite a number of major changes. From working in fast pace office to working at home, from work overseas to working locally, from taking public transport to learning to ride my own motorbike. The things they say about leaving your comfort zone is not wrong. It’s a major struggle especially emotionally. I’m so used to be independent and to be in control. The changes made me lost that control and independence. I lost confidence. I lack courage. At times, I felt lost. Part of me wanting to go back to old life to my comfort zone, part of me tells me to stay build comfort zone here, part of me asking me to leave a look for else where. Now that I’m about to officially start a new life in a new year and looking back to the things I’ve been through in 2014, I felt glad that I decided to go through with it. I left my stress, pressure, and monotonous life behind and came to explore new possibility at home.

Throughout the journey, I have learnt a lot. Obviously, I’m not making as much money as I used to. Very little in comparison in fact. However, in return, I felt more alive, more at home, peace at heart. I felt more in touch and bonded with people. I guess this is probably what people meant when they choose soul over salary. I’d be a hypocrite if I say I’m contented with my little pay and lower status. It’s just that over time, I have explored that it is not some thing that I value family, heart, and happiness more highly over salary and overseas status. And money and status is some thing that I believe I can work on and earn over time regardless where I am. So I have come to accept my choice, to live with it and move forward regardless of the consequences, I will make the best of it. I do fear of judgmental opinion from peers and friends. But I have also come to strongly believe that those who judge aren’t my real friend, and my real friends do not judge. All in all, things that matter most to me is support and understanding from my family. On top of that, another thing that really open my eyes is the fact that I see many foreigners flooding Cambodia to invest and run business, while the locals are flooding out trying to find work overseas for companies. Only a handful of locals with enough vision and capital able to see the abundance of opportunity at home. Then I asked myself, why do I want to get out when everybody is coming in? Well, I think the obvious answer to most people would give is safety, security and possible higher monetary gain. People always tend to look for safe and secure environment to settle. It’s an animal instinct nature to look for more safe and secure environment to reproduce.

Regardless of their choice, I’m glad for friends who are happy with their choice to settle where they are. I can only feel sorry for friends who chose anything other being where they are happiest and live in the illusion that they are happy because they have more money. Either way, there is no real indicator of happiness. Only you yourself can tell. You can lie to everybody but not yourself. I can say I’m happy to everybody and they may or may not believe it but in my heart I always know the truth. So the good news is if you are not happy you can lie about it to everybody and people will think you are happy. It’s very long and unpredictable journey which you cannot see clearly. I’ve seen people with a good head start tumble and fall behind. I have also seen people with little or no future prospect end up doing so well in life so far. One thing that I believe for sure is that good things will come to people who constantly make decision, make changes, take action to move forward and looking for new opportunity and work hard for it. Blessing is given to people who keep trying and standing back up every time they fall.

I’m looking forward to another challenging year ahead and hoping for the best while preparing to work my hardest. And wishing all my friends and love ones another safe and healthy year.

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2015

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